LESS THEN IMPRESSIVE

LAST YEAR IN JULY 2010 I HAD THE PRIVILEGE OF LEADING THE WORSHIP SERVICE AND PERFORMING A COUPLE OF ORIGINAL SONGS AT OUR CHURCHES ANNUAL CONFERENCE. IT JUST SO HAPPENED THAT YEAR WE HAD DARLENE BISHOP AND PAULA WHITE AS GUEST SPEAKERS. AS YOU MAY GUESS THE CHURCH WAS FULL. I REMEMBER THAT NIGHT. I FELT GREAT ABOUT MY PART IN THOSE SURFACES. THE EXCITEMENT OF THE MOMENT AND OF THE ATMOSPHERE AND THE MOMENT HAD ON A PERSONAL HIGH.

A COUPLE OF DAYS LATER OUR MEDIA DEPARTMENT PUT CLIPS OF MYSELF ON FACEBOOK. I CAN'T RECALL IF I EVER VIEWED THEM OR NOT. BUT I DO KNOW THAT I ENDED UP ASKING THEM (THE MEDIA TEAM) TO POST THOSE CLIPS ON YOUTUBE. OF COURSE, YOU CAN ASSUME I HAD NOT COME OFF OF THAT PERSONAL HIGH YET.

NOW FAST FORWARD ALMOST A YEAR LATER TO APRIL/MAY 2010. I FINALLY BUILT UP ENOUGH COURAGE TO LISTEN TO THE CLIPS. I WAS HORRIFIED WITH WHAT I HEARD. EVERY BAD NOTE, EVERY UNCLEAR SOUND, IT ALL SEEMED SO WRONG. I COULDN'T STAND TO LISTEN TO THOSE CLIPS ONE MORE TIME AND DID NOT WANT TO GIVE ANYONE ELSE THE OPPORTUNITY AS WELL. LIKE A CONSTANT FLOW OF A RAINY DAY I REPEATEDLY TOLD MYSELF, "YOU NEED TO GET THOSE CLIPS TAKEN OFF ASAP."

I WAS MOTIVATED BY MY OWN SELF WILL. HOW COULD I LET ANYBODY HEAR THIS AND I'M PREPARING TO RELEASE MY FIRST RECORD? WHO WOULD WANT TO BY MY STUFF AFTER LISTENING. IT'S NOT GOOD FOR MY BRAND. IT'S NOT IMPRESSIVE ENOUGH.

THEN ONE SUNDAY IN JUNE A LADY COMES UP TO ME AFTER CHURCH. THIS LADY HAD LOST HER TEENAGE DAUGHTER ONLY A FEW YEARS AGO. SHE WOULD GO ON TO TELL ME THAT IT WAS AROUND THE ANNIVERSARY OF HER CHILD'S DEATH AND THAT SHE WAS HAVING A ROUGH TIME AT HOME. THEN SHE SAID SHE RAN ACROSS MY CLIPS ON FACEBOOK AND LISTENED TO THEM OVER AND OVER, AND COULDN'T STOP LISTENING. SHE LOOKED AT ME AND TOLD ME YOU NEVER KNOW HOW MUCH YOU CAN HELP SOME ONE WITH YOUR MINISTRY.

AT THAT MOMENT I WAS HUMBLED. I WAS MORE CONCERNED WITH BEING IMPRESSIVE, BEING ACKNOWLEDGED, BEING CELEBRATED, ETC., THEN BEING USED BY GOD. BUT THE TRUTH IS WHAT IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN. GOD IS NEVER IMPRESSED BY THE TONE OF YOUR VOICE, THE SKILLFULNESS OF YOUR PERFORMANCE, OR WHATEVER YOU THINK YOU MAY HAVE. HE GAVE THEM TO YOU. HE'S ALSO NOT DETERRED BY YOUR LACK THEREOF. THE WORLD AND THE CHURCH OFTEN TEACH US THAT WE HAVE TO BE AWE INVITING, EXCEPTIONAL AND IMPRESSIVE IN THE GIFTS THAT WE ARE GIVEN. HOWEVER AS I LOOKED OVER MY LIFE IN MINISTRY ONE THING HAS BEEN VERY CONSISTENT AND SURE. GOD HAS DONE THE MOST THROUGH ME DURING THE TIMES THAT I FELT LESS THEN IMPRESSIVE. WHEN I DECREASED HE GAVE AN INCREASE.

GOD DOESN'T CHOOSE OR USE AS MEN DO FOR MEN LOOKS ON THE OUTWARD APPEARANCE BUT GOD LOOKS ON THE HEART. SO WHAT IF YOU WOWED THE CROWED IF THE INNER MAN IN GOD'S EYES WAS "LESS THEN IMPRESSIVE."